Addiction recovery is a challenging and transformative journey, often requiring a combination of personal determination, professional support, and practical strategies to heal. Many of my clients who are successful in their recovery employ a grounding tool of establishing a consistent morning ritual. While many might view the morning as just the start of the day, …
The phenomenon of gay men marrying women is complex and multifaceted. While each individual’s circumstances are unique, several common themes emerge when exploring this topic. While not truly exhaustive, here are a few reasons that help shed light on why some gay men choose to enter heterosexual marriages. Cultural and Societal Expectations In many cultures, …
Many men in sexual addiction recovery and their partners struggle with the objectification of others in public. As humans we all seek out novelty and tend to notice people we find attractive. This can be problematic and confusing to someone new to recovery. Many partners also understand, and have witnessed, their partners indulging in this …
During a recent couples therapy session, a betrayed spouse asked her husband, newly in recovery from sex addiction, “How did you not think of me or the kids when you acted out?” The confusion, pain and hurt she expressed was immensely palpable. His response: “I was so cut off from myself I wasn’t thinking, I …
Fear is a primary emotion many trauma survivors and people in recovery struggle with. Many try to flee the reactions and sensations it triggers through addictive or other self-destructive behaviors. I work with my clients to be mindful that experiencing fear (like all emotions) is invaluable to our health and survival. The thoughts and reactions …
An Introduction My client sat in the chair looking down at the floor, glancing up briefly to make eye contact, then darting his eyes back to the carpet. He spoke quietly, as if almost afraid to be heard. He clutched his hands throughout the session, displaying all the markers of an anxious man in the …
As a sex addiction therapist I work with my clients to help them understand how their compulsive use of porn impacts their lives and relationships. In this process it is often helpful to look at the “who, what, why, where and how” of their porn use. I go beyond asking my clients the obvious questions …
Anxiety is an emotional and physical reaction to a perceived fear, threat or challenge that often stems from uncertainty about potential circumstances or situations. In short, anxiety is the fear of uncertainty. If you suffer from anxiety and are interested in calming it, you may have considered Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). I have found CBT …
The recent hacking of Ashley Madison.com, a website dedicated to helping people seek out extramarital affairs, has raised much fear and anxiety among those who created profiles on the site. The data of over 30 million alleged members has been compromised. More people will surely be impacted. Many of these people have logged on out …
A new study in Clinical Psychological Science confirms and lends proof to what many of us in the addiction field have known for years: shame can be a powerful barrier to recovery. The study, conducted by two psychologists at the University of British Columbia looked at the impact shame and guilt has on alcoholics in …